Friday, 11 June 2010

Gavin: A moving day (BMT+9)

We moved into the new ward today amongst a huge fanfare of how amazing it was. It was pretty smooth to be honest considering there's a lot of kids all having serious stuff pumped into them, but after that it all went pear shaped. GOSH have invested in an integrated TV system that allows you to browse the web, view patient information and has over 80 channels to choose from. But, despite having a moving date of 1 June to get all this ready, the only channel working was Dubai TV. I shit you not.
Now I'm not expecting 5 star hotel service or think anyone would jump through hoops for me but, on the day the world cup launches, I at least expected them to have the 4 terrestrial channels so my football mad boy could watch the only thing he's been looking forward to for three weeks.
I lost it I'm afraid. At the peak of my onslaught, I had two people from patient liasion, the Ward Sister, two IT guys, a TV contractor and the Director of Hospital Procurement (lots of hand shaking) outside the room trying to work this out. I was given two portable TV's (both without aerials) and a laptop to try to get it streamed live. Unfortunately, I was a proper arsehole but it seemed to pay off as, by 5pm, they'd added 2 'fake' channels at the end of the list that showed BBC1 and ITV (you just can't 'tune in' these mothers, they need about 15 people to reprogram them). Sonny watched the match and told me I was the best dad in the world. Yeah, you bet.
So... the new TV system. It's perfect for patients in an open ward who will order their food on it and watch TV with headphones. But, in a BMT ward, it's basically a tiny 18" telly that needs to be near Sonny (it's touch screen you see) which means no one else can watch it because of that angle. It's already covered in fingerprints (he's ten after all) and it looks like we'll need a visit from a bloke in a long black leather coat and sunglasses just to get his PS3 working on it. The gantry that holds it is solid steel and at forehead height above the parent bed - I've got two lumps already. It's like a giant robot holding an ipod.
It must have cost at least £30-40k per room. For a grand they could have had a 40" flat screen with freeview (like the Wittington), but if anyone would have suggested that, I'm sure they would have looked at them like they were mad... "How could these kids possibly cope without instant billing on demand and a full overview of hospital services?"
I just wish the people who made these decisions had actually spent a few nights in a room to see the subtle nuances of how you need to operate in them to keep things flowing. Then, and only then, could they see just how utterly ridiculous this decision was.

PS That's Sonny filling in 1-1 after the first game on his wallchart. Seeing what he has to lug about everywhere, you can probably understand why I just wanted him to be happy

PPS One of the other dads who kept his mouth shut and then walked off through the whole episode moaned to me tonight that he couldn't watch the football. I didn't tell him about the 'secret' channels. Told you I was being an arsehole.

1 comment:

  1. I reckon Sonny has got the best mum, dad and sister in the world and he MUST be the best son in the world!

    Andrew received a great off side joke today but it will a little wasted on all my girlfriends as they'd understand it the rule! Is it just me that doesn't!!! Its about girls in a primark queue forgetting purses, not being able to queue jump until they get to the cash desk and having purses thrown at them from the back of the queue, to be honest I didn't really get that either!!

    Its great to see you standing Sonny. x

    And finally Gav....have you thought about a career change!

    Love to you all. Enjoy footie
    Lots of love
    Rach, Andrew, Maya and Eva

    PS (Girls very envious Sonny of your famous visitors!)