Gavin: And so it goes on...

The following is an abridged version of phone calls that meant I missed the entire Arsenal V Man Utd semi Final and the amazing Van Persie hat trick...

(Phone rings)
"Hi, it's the on-call consultant at the Wittington, I'm afraid that with a BP of 150 Sonny needs to come in"
"Ooookaaaay, but why? We all know his BP has been high for a few weeks and the Renal team at GOSH  have him on a programme so I don't want him in if you're just going to do obs"
"Right, well I've spoken to GOSH and they're adamant he comes in."
"Ok, I'll call GOSH and call you back"
(Phone GOSH)
"Hi, it's Gavin Sonny's dad"
"Oh hi, how is he"
"He's great, chirpy chatty and watching football"
"So why are you ringing if he's so good?"
"Because apparently you've told him to go into The Witt for a shot of Nifedipine which he can't have anyway as he has a reaction"
"OK, but I think he needs to be seen by a doctor"
"Why?"
"Because of his BP"
"...Which has been high for 3 weeks and he was let home by you with it at 162 so why the panic?"
"Right, err, ok, err, how about we give him another dose of Atenolol tonight and you take his BP again and he can stay home?"
"Fine, but I can't take his BP as I don't have the machine, although I've organised for a community nurse to be here at 9am to do it in the morning"
"OK, let's do that"
(Phone the WItt)
"Hi, we're giving him and extra dose and I'll bring him in if anything changes"
"Err, ok, but who have you spoken to?"
"The on-call BMT Reg"
"She was the one that told me to tell you that Sonny had to come in"
"I've convinced her he doesn't"
(slightly pissy now, adopts a condescending voice)
"So who would you rather ring in the morning me, the renal team or the on-call BMT Reg?"
"D'you know what, I'd rather ring none of you as it's my weekend and we're in exactly the same position as we were on Friday after spending a pointless 4 hours at GOSH and given a clear plan that you weekend Registrars don't know about and are only going on the fact that his BP is high rather than reading two foot of notes to get a fuller picture"
"I see... err, bring him in if anything changes then"
"No shit sherlock".